Transformational Servant Leadership with Kingdom Live

Hear this vision on how to balance both vision and care as you influence the people around you. It is important to both push people as well as show them you care about them as you lead them forward.

Question for discussion: What is your response to Transformational Servant Leadership and how can you use it to influence others around you?

Dr. Jeanine Parolini, PhD, MBA, MA

Phone: 651-295-6044
Email: jparolini@gmail.com
Website: www.JeanineParolini.com
Social Media: linkedin.com/in/jeanineparolini or facebook.com/jeanine.parolini

 

God is Present by Dr. Jeanine Parolini: Part Two

Having God present means everything! With God present, I am never alone. That has a calming effect on my anxiety, fear, impatience, sadness, and loneliness. For someone who fears rejection that leads to abandonment, it means so much to have God with me and always available. God’s presence can completely change a difficult moment into an uplifting time of possibility. God turns my inner turmoil into love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, gentleness, kindness, faithfulness, and self-control. Where else in this world, do we get to exchange our clutter for such treasure! Truly these are the most important resources in life, and they come with God’s presence.

God’s presence is also our hope! It brings hope in knowing that God is always looking out for me and I am not alone in maneuvering through this life, whatever is in my past, present and future. I have a powerful resource beyond anything I can offer because of God’s presence. His power is always available to increase my abilities, energy, influence, and impact in all my circumstances. God is available to give me what I need to push forward or to surrender when I need to. He supports me in giving over control to Him and His purposes so that I move toward Godly choices. Sometimes I need to deal with uncertainty in healthier ways or interact with an outcome in a more fruitful way. Whatever I face, God is available to enhance my resources and guide me in working it through better than I would have on my own. God’s power is part of His presence and it is available when I turn to Him for it. His presence provides the support and power to accept, push forward or pull back, and to ultimately grow to be more like Christ.

Since God is ever present, always existing and occurring, it is up to us to acknowledge Him. So He is literally available upon the asking. All we need to do is think about Him, ask Him to be with us, request Him to work in a situation or in a person’s heart, or ask Him to lead us. So thinking about God and acknowledging Him and His presence are truly underlying all of our requests. God is present with us and we mainly need to think of Him, remember Him, and ask for his support and His power. It really is that simple!

Question for discussion: How can God’s presence add value to your life right now? What is your response to this post?

Dr. Jeanine Parolini, PhD, MBA, MA

Phone: 651-295-6044
Email: jparolini@gmail.com
Website: www.JeanineParolini.com
Social Media: linkedin.com/in/jeanineparolini or facebook.com/jeanine.parolini

God is Present by Dr. Jeanine Parolini: Part One

The deeper I go in my Christian journey of faith, the simpler and more straightforward my thinking becomes. Through a recent trial in life, I am discovering a greater significance surrounding God’s presence. I see that God is much more available and with me than I originally thought.

God is with us. He is always present in this world and in heaven above. Psalm 139:7 explains there is nowhere to get away from God’s Spirit and presence. Psalm 16:11 encourages us that His presence brings us joy along the path of life. In Matthew 28:20, God says He will be with us to the end. Hebrews 13:5 affirms God will not only never leave us but never forsake us. God is always with us and makes His presence known to us when we talk to Him.

God’s presence means that He is here, right now. Having presence is to exist, occur, be in place, even if we don’t see Him. So often, especially during hard times, we want to see, touch, and hear God. His presence is not based upon our ability to see, touch and audibly hear. Even when things are right in front of me, I can miss them. I may fail to properly deal with people or circumstances well in the moment. Or I could avoid hearing what is said. I can’t completely count on my own understanding for the presence of someone or something. Therefore, it is vital that I believe in faith in the presence of God and that He is here upon the asking so I don’t miss Him.

Dr. Jeanine Parolini, PhD, MBA, MA

Phone: 651-295-6044
Email: jparolini@gmail.com
Website: www.JeanineParolini.com
Social Media: linkedin.com/in/jeanineparolini or facebook.com/jeanine.parolini

Moving from Avoiding to Speaking the Truth in Love: Part Two

Paul continues to inspire us that speaking the truth in love supports us in living as people full of God’s light. In fact, speaking loving truth leads to right thinking, understanding, closeness with God, closeness with others, soft heartedness, a good conscience, and redemption. These behaviors bring light and life to our lives as well as to the lives of others. Paul implies that getting things out in the open ought to be for these purposes, to build others up, and to rid ourselves of negative feelings and motives towards one another. Speaking up can also free us from withholding forgiveness as we seek understanding. I am struck by God’s goodness that comes with this quest to speak up to one another!

From my experience, the practical benefits to individuals and groups for speaking up are extensive. As a developer of principled leaders and learning organizations, I see the payoff day in and day out to the individual and to the organization for speaking the truth in love. We are finding that organizational health begins with clarity that instills integrity in the organization. It actually appears that truthful discussion can lead to progressive change. An honest conversation can be the spark that begins real positive movement in the life of an individual, in a group and in an organization. A number of honest conversations can actually build momentum. In the workplace, ministry, family life, and in our communities, I see the positive impact of speaking the truth in love to one another.

Seeking God for how and when we have these conversations is important. We need to move from seeing our anxiety in the short-term to believing in the long lasting benefits God has for us and for the groups we serve. Reminding ourselves that God is present with us and He is ready to lead us is reassuring. The vision is to move from avoiding the conversation to seeing the necessity of having it. The purpose is to honor and glorify God by investing truth into individuals, groups and organizations. The goal is to build us up into safer and healthier individuals and communities of light and life as Paul encourages. In following through, we bring greater truth into our lives and into the lives of our families, communities, workplaces and churches. This is so important to God’s redemptive plan and purposes. Let’s not let our communities blow up; rather let’s build them up by speaking the truth in love to one another!

Question for discussion: How does this blog post impact you? Is there a place where you need to speak up? What will you do next?

Dr. Jeanine Parolini, PhD, MBA, MA

Phone: 651-295-6044
Email: jparolini@gmail.com
Website: www.JeanineParolini.com
Social Media: linkedin.com/in/jeanineparolini or facebook.com/jeanine.parolini

Moving from Avoiding to Speaking the Truth in Love: Part One

Coming to terms with when to speak up about a topic and when to be silent can be a challenge! In a world that pulls at us with constant distractions and frequent interruptions, it can be difficult to find the time to reflect on our relationships. It takes time and energy to uncover what is going on in our hearts, and our energy and time can get consumed by other necessary priorities. Also, fear or anxiety around what to say and how to say it may keep us from speaking up. The worry of making a mistake or being misunderstood may be too great to face the conversation. For most of us, speaking up is too risky, costly, draining and too time consuming. From my observations, avoiding hard conversations seems to be a normal human response.

So let’s normalize it. It’s human to not want to speak up about something that’s uncomfortable and could cause further discomfort or that has the potential to come in-between relationships. Some of us have experienced the consequences of these attempts and it’s been very painful. We may have lost or broken relationships because of trying to do what seemed right at the time. For one reason or another, most of us don’t like the thought of speaking up and will do everything we can to avoid it.

At the same time, God always has more for us than our natural human response. He is out for our redemption. On the one hand, thank God for that! We have hope in our humanness. On the other hand, what does redemption have to do with this topic?

Even around a seemingly small matter like speaking up, Jesus turns things around and upside down! I love what Jesus envisions for us even though it can be hard to do. His purpose is to revitalize people and situations. It is so important to us, to our relationship, and to our Christian community that we don’t want to miss what God is up to here.

Throughout Ephesians 4, Paul discusses speaking the truth in love, and he connects that with our growth, unity and overcoming a destabilizing lack of truth. In verse 14, he compares and contrasts infancy and maturity related to speaking the truth in love. Those who are early in their faith unwisely avoid it and those who are mature wisely engage in speaking truth. Paul goes on to discuss how we end up “tossed around by the wind and waves” when we avoid speaking truth to one another. This means we can become uncertain, not solidly founded, confused, and even chaotic. Truth can get lost in the midst of untruth, lies and deception. People, groups and organizations can lose their way as the darkness of this dynamic overtakes them. Rather, we are to speak the truth in love to one another to grow individually and together. As we do this, we can continue to move in a principled, unified and solid direction.

Dr. Jeanine Parolini, PhD, MBA, MA

Phone: 651-295-6044
Email: jparolini@gmail.com
Website: www.JeanineParolini.com
Social Media: linkedin.com/in/jeanineparolini or facebook.com/jeanine.parolini

Catching a Cheater

Fellow dating friends,

My guess is we all agree that we are not interested in cheaters, right?

Let’s talk about one of my more recent dates to see what we can learn together about catching a cheater… As far as I know, this is a first for me. It speaks to the increasing moral breakdown of our society when it comes to dating… and I hope we can learn together from it. That’s my goal.

I met a Christian man online. After writing for a bit and then having a phone call, he asked me to go on a date. I canceled our date when he said he wanted to bring his 9-year old son. That was not the way I wanted to meet him for the first time (or his son)!

The next six months were interesting. He was persistent. He connected now and then, letting me know he was thinking of me and wondering if I’d change my mind.” Sometimes I responded and other times I did not.

Over the next few months he continued to pursue me to let me know he wondered if God had reserved us for one another. He said he was praying a lot about us. Here is what was odd though; he didn’t seem to have time to get together because of his second job and he would get back to me when he was more available. It took him two to three months to actually plan a date. That was a flag to me and I let him know I was no longer interested and moving on.

This is where he got to me. He apologized, said he would make the relationship a priority if we connected well and he asked me to give him one date to see what God was up to. He insisted that God was prompting him and he actually made a date. We got together and enjoyed ourselves and he asked me to go out again. I was not available when he asked so I suggested another day. This also was odd; he said I took him by surprise and he would need to think about it and get back to me. The next day he did get back to me and said he would take off work the next day to have lunch with me. I said that sounded good. I also asked him for his last name but he did not respond on two occasions. This also seemed odd. I let him know I was uncomfortable with not having his last name. He made a joke, said it was a fun adventure and that he would give it to me over lunch. I said to him that I was concerned and not having fun. He sent his last name.

When I looked him up, I found all sorts of picture of him on Facebook with a woman, and I found the same on her Facebook page. I let him know that I saw the pictures and he said they were just friends and he still hung out with her. I said that they looked like more than friends, that I didn’t want to get in the middle of their relationship, and that I was canceling our date. He said he would not contact me again. I confronted him on his bad behavior and let him know I would make this known to his pastor to hold him accountable.

Here is what I learned, see if it helps you:

  • A lack of availability is a cause for a pause; someone who is available and interested will want to get together sooner than later
  • A push/pull is a cause for a pause; look for consistency, not hot and cold
  • A disconnect between someone’s words and actions is a cause for a pause; when the person is expressing interest and that God is in this but not following through with getting together, something is not right
  • A withholding of information is a cause for pause; get a last name on the first date or sooner then look do your research. In this online world of dating, this is wise
  • Address bad behavior for your own mental and emotional health and potentially for the mental and emotional health of others; don’t be a victim of bad behavior and don’t hide from addressing it. Create a better world by speaking the truth in love and with respect when you experience bad behavior

What have you learned from my story or from your own similar stories? Let’s help each other grow by sharing our learning together in a positive way to move forward

Dr. Jeanine Parolini, PhD, MBA, MA

Phone: 651-295-6044
Email: jparolini@gmail.com
Website: www.JeanineParolini.com
Social Media: linkedin.com/in/jeanineparolini or facebook.com/jeanine.parolini

SEXI Video 5: Dr Jeanine Parolini on the I in SEXI

In Dr. Jeanine Parolini’s explanation of the I in SEXI, she discusses the importance of common interests to keep the relationship fresh and alive. Developing common interests over the long haul in a relationship also leads to a fulfilling romance and is part of a passionate sex life. Let’s put the important time into developing common interests rather that moving too quickly into hooking up within a surface relationship.

Watch the Video Below

Question for reflection: What are the key common interests that you would like to share in a relationship to keep it fresh, alive, fulfilling and romantic?

For further information see: https://www.jeanineparolini.com/ or https://www.jeanineparolini.com/dating-and-relating/

SEXI Video 4: Dr Jeanine Parolini on the X in SEXI

In this 4th video of the series, Dr. Jeanine Parolini discusses the importance of communication and chemistry in Christian dating and in developing a real relationship. A spiritual and emotional connection, along with good communication and chemistry, are what support a long term passionate sexual relationship. This is quite different than what is going on in today’s dating world where surface relationships quickly turn into sexual relationships that end up hurting more than helping couples. Let’s put the time and effort in to develop something more real and fulfilling than that!

Watch the Video Below

Question for reflection: What do you think of the connection between communication and chemistry and how will you watch out for them with your future dates?

For further information see: https://www.jeanineparolini.com/ or https://www.jeanineparolini.com/dating-and-relating/

SEXI Video 3: Dr Jeanine Parolini on the E in SEXI

Dr. Jeanine Parolini continues to explain her SEXI model of Christian dating by discussing the E. She shares how to develop and assure there is an emotional connection to establish a healthy, safe, and trusting relationship, which goes beyond today’s surface and hook up relationships.

Watch the Video Below

Question for reflection: What do you need from your partner to feel emotionally connected and how will you go about assessing it with future dates?

For further information see: https://www.jeanineparolini.com/ or https://www.jeanineparolini.com/dating-and-relating/

SEXI Video 2: Dr Jeanine Parolini on the S in SEXI

Dr. Jeanine Parolini explains the S in her SEXI model of Christian dating which represents developing a spiritual connection around a common set of values. The spiritual aspect of a relationship impacts all areas of the relationship. At the heart level, most human beings want to feel safety and trust in relationships which requires a level of common values and morals. This is needed to develop a real relationship. Yet our dating world has become completely the opposite with surface level relationships, deception and quick hook ups.

Watch the Video Below

Question for reflection: How important is the spiritual aspect of a relationship to you, and how will you go about checking it out with future dates?

For further information see: https://www.jeanineparolini.com/ or https://www.jeanineparolini.com/dating-and-relating/